Saturday, November 4, 2017

Dear Daddy- An Open Letter of Gratitude

 Dear Daddy,

I miss you. I wish you were still here. I cannot lie and say I have fully accepted that in a few days it will be one year since you left. For the first time in my life, I understand that time is relative. Never has a year been so quick yet so slow. Never have I had so many experiences yet felt nothing at all.

I think in many ways I am very lucky to have had you as a father. I am blessed to say that we really had nothing left that was unsaid. I was actually one of the people you did not have the last conversation with, and now I understand why.

Because you said it, and at the time I refused to actually hear it. That you knew I was going to be fine.

You had faith in me before I even had faith in myself.

You knew one day I would wake up and realize my worth, and that nothing you had ever done was in vain.

I want to thank you for protecting me, and thank you for staying silent.

Thank you for not killing some of, if not all of my boyfriends, as I know fully well that you thought about it OFTEN!

Thank you for letting me make my mistakes. They have made me and continue to make me who I am.

Thank you for really knowing me, though many times you were a man of few words, that had no effect on the bond we shared.

Thank you for our last heart to heart as father and daughter, as we were driving into Port of Spain. I know you are looking over me, knowing I will soon fulfill that final piece of advice you gave to me.

Thank you for being imperfect.

Thank you for showing me what a true gentleman does. Thank you for showing me what I can expect of a man. 

Thank you for being an example of true love.
 

Thank you for being the one man in the world who honestly told me I was beautiful, and I knew you meant it, because you had nothing to gain.

Thank you for that note you wrote that I found after you died.

I was going through a dark time and wrote many things I disliked of myself, my sadness and my lack of self-love.

You wrote over it,
I LOVE YOU!YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL (in caps)!

I wonder if you knew- that years later, at 30 years old, that would change my life and fold me into a heap of tears.

Thank you for giving me hope.

I love you,


Natasha.






Sunday, October 29, 2017

Favourite Alternate Exercises: Spicing It Up as a Solo workout Girl

In my blog post about PCOS, I wrote about weight loss, and how I incorporated exercise into my lifestyle.

Today I want to go a little bit deeper and let you in on my secret. My favorite routines, programmes, and fitness enthusiasts.

I have stopped being an avid gym buff- mainly because I need to become more disciplined and get my ass into the gym. These days I work out at home and outdoors.

While I started off with Focus T25, I soon turned to alternatives, such as Insanity Max (currently in my second month!) and any sort of cross-fit, dancing, aerobics and dancing. I work out alone on a regular basis, so I need to constantly change my routine so that I stay motivated and do not get bored!
I also have recently started wearing brighter workout clothes as a way of staying motivated and I usually blast my favorite playlist from Deezer. You know you have done a routine like crazy when you can mute the video and play motivational music!

My  CrossFit Go-To right now:


Fitzala’s CrossFit workouts at home- I love this article because the routines are super easy to do and you can do them anywhere!

If you are looking for a great start-up routine, Check out Simply Sadie Jane’s Crossfit Series!

Cardio Go-To to mix things up when I am bored:


Estelle Archer’s Zumba Video-   Ole Ola
Keira LaShea- Burn to the Beat Dance Intervals: African Cardio Dance Workout-

Favourite Ab Workout of Life!!

Tiffany Rothe- 10 Minute Booty Shaking  Waist Workout- Lose inches off your waist ( TESTIFY! IT WORKS) I loved this video so much I shared it all of my girlfriends.  I will never forget the first time I did it, I woke up the following morning sore! Did I mention it works!!!

Also, good old Russian Twists are everything!

Outdoors:

Keeping it fun can be challenging without a workout buddy. But when I have one I love to do Lady Chancellor Hill. It's a two-mile uphill trek, that many times seems null. The reward aside from having completed the hill is the stunning vista of the country's capital Port of Spain. My favorite time to go is early morning before the heat kicks into high gear and of course, we always throw in a few selfies!

I also try to throw in an outdoor jog whenever I can, one of my favorite places to do this is the Queens Park Savannah (which we proudly boast is the biggest in the world).  Plug in some good music and/or company and just go!

Keeping it fun can always be a challenge, many times I stand up and say loudly "I don't want to do this" but then I buckle down and get it done, half-hearted sometimes- but at least it is done!

How do you keep active and stop your workouts from becoming boring? Let me know!

Like what you have read! Subscribe so you can be up to date with all the latest posts! Keep an eye out for my favorite work out tunes.

Have a great week!





Friday, October 20, 2017

Carnival- The True Festival of Love

For those of you who don't know. I currently live in Trinidad and Tobago. I came to live here when I was six years old.

The first major experience I had, was 'playing mas', or as it is better known Carnival.

Trinidad carnival, I think, is still one of the best-kept secrets in the world. If you have Caribbean heritage or Caribbean friends you may know about it.

But you don't REALLY  know about it until you touch down and the whole place shell down.That is, you come here, fete (party) non-stop (this is to be taken literally), collect your costume and come Monday morning you hit the road.

With the recent media coverage of Caribbean carnivals, many people have negative remarks and comments about our behaviour. The gyrating ,  the bumping and grinding. But fail to recognise the most important thing, it is your option as to how you conduct yourself.

Just to be clear-  there is no more euphoric feeling than stepping out on that road and hearing the bass of soca music pulsating through the country's capital. Pulsating is no joke, shop windows vibrate, the vibration rises from the earth through our feet into our waists as we wine high and low to the music.

Big Bad Soca- Bunji Garlin



This post is short and sweet just like our carnival season!  Carnival is never long enough!!! Then we have to wait a whole year till the next time we can participate in the GREATEST SHOW ON EARTH!

Though there is no better experience than chipping and wining on the road Carnival Monday and Tuesday, if you can't stay that's okay.

Fete to your heart's content in the weeks leading up to it.


Not convinced about hitting the road? Take in one of my favourite fetes!Soca Brainwash.... 






Here's a taste of some of the costumes, just a teaser!




Counting down to Carnival!
T-113 DAYS!!

Interested? Don't be a stranger! Message me!


The world needs more love!

Wednesday, October 18, 2017

I Received a Blogger Recognition Award!

I Have Received a Blogger Recognition Award!!!!


What a surprise! I am delighted and blown away that I have received a Blogger Recognition Award from Lazy Wonton Blogs! There I was, sort of sifting through, checking to see if I had made any headway on blog traffic and I saw the comment. Again, dead surprised!

Big Up (That’s like ‘Respect!’ in Trinidad) Lazy Wonton Blogs. I sat down and really pored through the blog and felt the frustration, also the humor in those moments that we are lucky to be a part of. The blunt honesty is refreshing and a nice reality check. For example,. How many people really prefer Starbucks over every other coffee??

Why Did I Start My Blog?

I started my blog as an outlet for my thoughts and to express myself. I had a good example. My mum, who has been blogging since Yahoo 360 days, and always seemed to enjoy it, so I opted for it as a choice to really let out my frustration. Oddly enough, my best writing came when I was at my lowest and darkest places. In many ways, I also felt like (and still do) feel like I would like to offer my experiences as tribute (ha ha ha).

Really, when I was younger, there were certain things I needed to know, and I want to hopefully help someone who needs that knowledge and/or inspiration (hopefully!).

Advice to New Bloggers?

Oddly I think the first thing is, you can never stop learning. So don’t be shy to ask any questions, as the saying goes – There is NO SUCH THING AS A STUPID QUESTION.

Allow yourself the freedom to be creative. While it is good to take into account what your audience may enjoy, do not be afraid to put your heart and soul into your writing, honesty brings out the best in everyone and everything.
One thing regarding post length. I have learned after going over previous posts. Keep it short and engaging. Honestly, even now, when I am delving into the blogosphere, I tend to brush over long posts, unless it is on a topic that I am incredibly interested in.
Also, spell check is your best friend. I have made and continue to make errors. Do not be afraid to mull over a post, or have a trusted friend read over it before you click publish!

So I had to nominate 15 bloggers! Here we go!

  1. Haylee's Words of Wonder
  2. Becoming Britton
  3. Kanvas K
  4. Joy 42
  5. The Home Handcrafted
  6. Life In The Ali
  7. Obsessed With Everything
  8. Catherine Chicotka
  9. Halle Regina
  10. Tea With Tara
  11. A Freckled Traveler
  12. Shara (Like Sarah)
  13. Kady Curtis
  14. Rep N Pepper
  15. Words and Wonders

The blogs above have been inspirational! Hopefully, you enjoy them as much as I have!

Accepting this Award:

~Make sure you take the time to thank the blogger who gave you your nomination.  Write a little bit about them and their blog and provide a link of where to find their blog.
~Write a post to show your award
~Briefly explain why you started your blog
~Share some advice to new bloggers
~Select 15 other bloggers you would like to nominate for this award
~Comment on each blog and let them know you have nominated them; provide the link to the post you have created regarding the award.




If you have any tips, please share them! We never stop learning!!






Wednesday, October 11, 2017

Night Musings_

I believe it goes without saying.

Everyone has weak moments.

However it is the company you keep, that can pull you through.
I remember my father would say.
"Show me your friends and I will show you who you are."

How right he was.

Today as I received my facebook memories, I glimpsed a memory thanking friends for being there for me in what I thought then was a tough time.

If only I had known that what I thought was challenging, was nothing compared to the blow I was about to feel. A blow that would unearth pain, suffering and harsh realities I turned a blind eye to.

I am reminded of the saying. Blowing out someone else's candle will not make yours shine brighter.

Wise words from someone who obviously  lived through it.

Saturday, October 7, 2017

Things I Wish I had Known and Focused On More

 I remember when I was eighteen years old, I came home one day and I was told I would be going "home".  From spending my days on the beach to pounding a pavement. It was one of the best things that could have ever happened to me.

It is funny how sometimes we are taught many things, but we don't follow up on them, whether it is out of fear, sheer laziness or insecurity.

As my journey continues, I decided to list things that I needed either to know, focus on, learn or believe in.
  1. You can always start over
  2. There is always a lesson
  3. Letting go is easiest when you rip it off like a band-aid
  4. You are beautiful
  5. You are smart
  6. Not every successful person is an academic
  7. You don’t need to know exactly what you want to be when you’re a teenager
  8. Never stop daydreaming
  9. What you repeatedly focus on will manifest
  10. Discipline is not easy, it takes commitment
  11. Life is only as difficult as you make it
  12. Don’t follow the crowd
  13. Stand up for yourself 
  14. Look at what’s going on inside you when you feel negative emotion towards another person
  15. Don’t let your past control your future
  16. Always follow your instinct
  17. Travel alone at least once.  Live in another country alone
  18. Follow your passion- it’s your calling.
  19. Mind your manners- you never know who may be watching you
  20. Don’t be afraid to leave people behind
  21. Live in the present moment mentally
  22. Say Goodbye
  23. Listen to your parents! Most times, they have been through it, or know the outcome per experience!

Life does not come with a rule book, so we need to share!




Saturday, September 30, 2017

A Journey of Little Footsteps: What You Never Saw



I hated primary school. 

They say be careful what you wish for. 

My family lost everything.

I did not go to school for roughly a year.

I stayed home every day.

Watched everyone go to school.

All of a sudden being unhappy at school did not compare to just not being there.

Our electricity was cut.

We had no food.

Bailiffs took little of what we had left.

I hid what I thought was valuable when I heard them coming.

I hid my dog.

But today, when people see me.

They judge.

They don't know.   


What I lived.

I lived in fear of judgment.

Until I realised I was being judged.

Their judgments.............

They insulted my life and my experiences.

You have no idea.

Do not judge a book by its cover.

Till today I have never let anyone open me.

But why not, since they have made their own assumptions, but never walked in my shoes.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

Walk in faith, believe in yourself and understand. Those who judge are blinded by their own thoughts.